Had a homemade chicken burger on top of some spinach for dinner. Eating was great until it got late and my sisters and I made cake balls. I am so terribly bloated and feel fat, gross and mad at myself. I just can’t keep it under control lately. I know it’s a journey and blah blah blah but I can’t help but feeling like I’m failing. I know you only fail if you give up but all I can think about is the time tht has passed and I haven’t made improvements. I couldn’t run today because it was almost 100 degrees and tomorrow is supposed I be worse. I swam in the pool all day so at least I was some what active. I am going to suck it up and run no matte what tomorrow and swim afterward as well. I am going to make tomorrow as clean as I can, I know Friday will be iffy with both alcohol and food due to my cousins wedding But after that one day I am going to start writing down everything I put into my mouth. I need to hold myself accountable. I need to start losing weight again. Monday I will start insanity again and continue running. I get back to LA early Tuesday morning so there is no excuse for not getting a work out in that day. I feel like I’ve made posts like this a lot but this is it. If I dont succeed now, I will truly be on a downward spiral on both my physical and mental health. I am going to make a change. I am going to not just feed my body but fuel it correctly. I am going to focus on all aspects of fitness. I feel like this is my last shot.